Filipina Dating

heartI started this website quite a few years ago and I think it’s time for a bit of an update.

I want to summarize (and restate) some of the things I’ve said already in a longer, more comprehensive post.

Here’s your ultimate guide to Filipina dating. I’ll share the step you should consider if you plan to meet a woman from the Philippines online.

Step 1: Choose a Good Website

I would personally recommend Christian Filipina because I’ve communicated with the creator/owner of the website and he’s a good guy. I think he really does his best to make sure that members have a good experience. I also believe the name and theme of this particular site tends to draw the kind of woman you want: a conservative, God-fearing Filipina.

I don’t believe I ever encountered a scammer on Christian Filipina back when I was still searching for love. Having said that, you will have to take some cautionary steps regardless of what website you use. That brings me to my next step.

Step 2: Watch for Scammers

You’ll hear a lot about Pinay scammers of you search about Filipna dating on Google or YouTube. Some make too much of this phenomenon; others make too little of it. The bottom line is that part of your task will be to weed out those who are misrepresenting themselves (usually for the sake of financial gain). It isn’t that difficult if you’ll just do a few things:

*Do a little social media background check on the girl you are chatting with. She should give you her Facebook information so you can check here profile out. You should see several “natural” pictures–photos with friends, family, classmates, etc. Even those who are not rich tend to be active on social media, so it may be a “red flag” if she directs you to a profile that doesn’t have much on it.

There are also several social profile searches you can use: just Google “free social profile search.” Search her name and/or email address and you should get some idea of whether or not she is who she claims to be. You may also want to put her email address in Google (or other search engines) and just see what comes up.

*Do an image search. Tineye is a great search engine you can use to find out if a Filipina you want to meet or date is using a genuine picture. If she’s using celebrity/model photos you’ll see that pretty quickly. You may also want to do a Google image search on her name and just see what comes up.

*Use video chat. Services like Skype are great for two reasons. First, you’ll be able to see her and verify that she’s a living, breathing woman that looks like the pictures she’s sent you. More importantly, I’ve found that it’s much easier to get a sense of chemistry when you are actually talking (instead of typing).  It’s kind of the next best thing to talking to a Filipina in person.

Understand this: internet cafes with webcams are now widely available in the Philippines. If she refuses to do video chat I can promise you she a scammer. It’s one thing if she is occasionally unable to do video chat–but don’t trust her if she always makes excuses not to be on camera.

*Very important: never, never, never give money to someone you haven’t met in person! Don’t blame me or anyone else if you ignore this rule and get ripped off. I’ve heard quite a few testimonies of guys that have started sending money to a girl in the Philippines only to discover that she was using him.  These are the nightmare stories that give Filipina dating a bad name and ruin it for the sincere ones.  Women who ask for money or start giving you “hints” about their desperate situations are not worth the trouble. I would advise you to simply cut off communication if a Filipina asks for money (directly or indirectly).

One more thing: I have found that the scammers who are out for money are usually not that patient.  She’ll show her true colors pretty quickly if fleecing you is her only goal.  Scammers lose interest pretty quickly if they find out you won’t send any money or gifts before meeting in person.

Step 3: Cautiously Build Friendship and Trust

Let’s say you have met a girl that seems sincere and genuine. Chat with her as often as you can and build the friendship. Do not profess your love to her or start making promises about engagement/marriage if you haven’t met her in person. You may think you love her, but there are just too many things you will not know without meeting her in person.

In the meantime you can get to know each other through frequent chatting and emailing.

I’ll interject something here: you may be wondering how many girls you should chat with at once and how many you should plan to meet. I can’t give you a cut-and-dry answer for this. You’ll probably start by contacting more than one Filipina and see who responds. I know guys who narrowed it down to one “prospect” before visiting the Philippines. I’ve known of others who plan to meet more than one and making a decision once they visit the country. Either way can work and you’ll have to decide what is best for you. My main advice is just to be completely honest with the women you are chatting with regarding your intentions.

Step 4: Plan to Meet Her Within a Reasonable Time Frame

Let’s say you have narrowed your search down and believe you have found the girl of your dreams. I would encourage you to book your ticket to the Philippines and try to meet her as soon as practically possible (within a few weeks). As I’ve mentioned, this is the only way you’ll know for sure she’s the right one for you.

I’ve encountered men who have chatted with Filipinas for months or years without any “end game” in mind: no definite plans to go to the Philippines. Don’t do this if you are really serious about love and marriage–go meet her! Don’t waste your and her time!

Filipina Dating: Summing it Up

Hopefully these tips have helped you. I feel very grateful to be married to a Filipina and I think there are plenty of lovely, sincere women in the Philippines who would make excellent wives. A little wisdom and common sense will go a long way in finding the right one for you.

Filipinas and Black Men

Let’s say you are an African-American man who is interested in finding love in the question-mark-lovePhilippines.  You may be wondering if you have a chance of winning a Filipina’s heart.  I’ll do my best to answer that question.

As I’ve mentioned before (see: Filipina Beauty), people in the Philippines tend to prefer Caucasian physical characteristics, such as a pointy nose, blue eyes, and light skin.  They avoid sun exposure (for fear of getting darker) and spend a lot of money on “skin whitening” products. Some of the most popular celebrities are half Caucasian.  This is simply the way it is right now.

But that doesn’t mean an African-American has no chance.  I’ve met quite a few black men who are happily married to Filipina women (almost all the ones I’ve met are retired military guys).  One of my readers (a retired black gentleman) recently let me know he’s had a really good response to his profile on a dating website.

So I would never discourage anyone, regardless of skin color, from looking for love in the Philippines.  I would offer a few tips:

*Be sure to post your profile picture.  You want to know upfront if the one you are chatting with is really open to you.

*This may sound obvious, but I would encourage you to ignore profiles that express a preference for white men only.  Don’t waste your time trying to convince someone who is not open-minded.

*Visit the Philippines if at all possible.  I think you’ll find that Filipinos are very warm and friendly to all regardless of skin color.

Helping Your Filipina Spouse Adjust to the USA

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Let’s say you’ve finally made it through all that red tape and brought your wife or fiancee to the USA.  How can you make her feel at home and help her adjust?  I’ll share some suggestions I believe you’ll find helpful.

Staying in Touch

Your wife will want to stay in touch with her family.  The internet, of course, is very helpful for this.  There are internet cafes all over the Philippines and it shouldn’t be too hard for family members to get online and chat with your wife.  Internet access for smart phones is becoming common as well, so her family may be able to communicate that way.

Texting can be done through a program called Chikka.  You can set up an account to send free texts.  Just warn the recipients that responding (from their cell phones) will cost money (it cost more than a regular text message if I remember correctly).

Calling is a different story.  For some reason calling to the Philippines costs a lot more than calling from the Philippines.  You can call a cell phone in the Philippines with Skype if you buy credits but it isn’t cheap (the rate is much higher than calling other countries).   You’ll also notice the Philippines isn’t included on most international calling plans.  I think there are a few different phone cards out there but I’ve never heard of a definite way to get a really good rate.  You may want to keep calling to a minimum because the costs can add up.

Sending Money

I won’t repeat everything I’ve said before about money and sharing, but your wife will probably want to occasionally (or regularly) send money back to her family.  I normally use Xoom.com for this and I’ve never had any problems.  It works really well for sending money to a bank account in the Philippines.  Usually when I send money this way the recipient has it in his/her account in under 24 hours.  I think other options are available (picking up the money at a specific location) but I’ve never tried doing it that way.

Filipino Media

Your wife will be able to get all kinds of Filipino media through video websites like Youtube.  Some cable companies carry channels catering to the Filipino community, especially if you live in a large city or place with a significant Filipino population.

Here’s another option that is available to anyone with an internet connection: The Filipino Channel.  You can subscribe to this channel for about 12 bucks a month and watch all kinds of content.  This looks like a perfect choice if your local cable provider doesn’t offer some kind of specialty channel for Filipinos.  It would also work well for those who don’t want to change their cable service just to get that one channel.

Filipino Food

You’ll need to invest in a rice cooker if you haven’t already.  She may want to eat rice for breakfast, lunch and dinner just like she does back home.  Larger cities will have at least one Filipino store so she can get some ingredients.  Fortunately, some dishes (like adobo) don’t require anything except what can be found at most grocery stores (vinegar, soy sauce, etc).

Filipino Community

Your wife will also find it helpful if she can meet some other Filipina friends in your community.  One way to go about this is search “Filipino American (name of your city/town/state)” and see what you can find.  There are Fil-Am associations all over the place.  You’ll eventually discover that people from the Philippines tend to find each other and gather together for social events like birthday parties.

Hope this helps!